How To Face And Solve Your Problems

If you want to be happy you have to be honest about your problems. For example, you may be thinking that nobody wants you, when, actually you are afraid of going out among people and taking part in social activity. You have a problem, but you have to see it in its true light before you tackle it effectively.

When a problem is unpleasant, we may try to persuade ourselves that it does not exist, that it is all a matter of imagination.

For example, it is possible to become fond of someone who cannot always be relied on and who may hurt and disappoint us again and again. Yet our tendency is to close our eyes to it and look instead for reasons which will excuse the behaviour of the person.

Most of us would try to avoid breaking up a relationship like marriage, the unity of the family, a close knit friendship. Our affection which is often strong on both sides generally outweights the unsatisfactory relationships.

On the other hand, it is necessary to be honest with ourselves so that we accept the truth about people and see them as they really are. When we recognize their faults and weaknesses, we develop the habit of not expecting the impossible from them. Thus we avoid being hurt so often and so deeply.

Sometimes, we run away from a problem by filling life with ceaseless activity. We tell ourselves and other people that this is our ‘nature’ and that we are happy only when we ‘keep busy’. This may be true but check on what happens during the occasional brief moments when you find yourself on your own. Do you hate being quite because then you start to think and to worry? Do you find it difficult to get to sleep without taking something ‘to help me relax? If you are like this you have a problem and you are running away from it.

We cannot push our problems into the back of the mind and hope that we will ‘forget’ them. Problems do catch up with us. Over indulgence in pleasure, and keeping continually occupied, may postpone the issue but it does nothing to help and may make it worse. It is best to face up to anything which worries you bravely and honestly. Gear your thinking to the practical side. Ask yourself : what can I do to make this better?”, “How can I ease this situation” etc.

It can help to write a letter to yourself. Get it out of the mind and down on paper expressed in black and white. Or, you can discuss it with somebody trustworthy, preferably somebody on the outside who is not biased one way or the other.

Some of our hardest problems are other people. However deeply we feel for them, and however much we worry, we cannot live other people’s lives. Realize this. Accept the truth that in the end they must be left to make their own decision to solve their problems.


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